this sloppy, fat sack of shit has an attitude with ME?!

- enuff said. carleton's "fat guy". (sorry boys, i know you have a rule, 'no fatties'.) -

A Contest

Which cover article from the March 7, 2009 issue of the New Orleans Times-Picayune is the MOST horrific? YOU DECIDE.

Dig! the Sequel: The Fearless Freaks

For those of us still trying to figure out how to navigate the oftentimes disorienting post-college world, we turn to special memories and relics of our collective past in hopes that we will be provided with a certain peace of mind and, perhaps, a renewed sense of purpose. Unfortunately, however, one special point of reminiscence has been rendered unattainable . . . because Paul owns that one copy of Dig! that we all used to watch. But worry no more! I have discovered Dig! 2.0; the rockumentary of a seemingly unlikely band: the Flaming Lips. Although Wayne Coyne barely resembles the sheer force of destruction that is Anton, there is plenty in The Fearless Freaks that makes it a fitting reincarnation of Dig!, including:

1. Heroin
2. Jail terms
3. A rival band
4. Lighting instruments on fire during concerts
5. Broken families
6. More heroin
7. Dirtbike exhaust used for on-stage fog machine

You would never guess that the joyous celebration that is a Flaming Lips show arose from such things. I definitely recommend this movie. If you have Netflix, you can stream it.

The Max and Jason Factory

So That's Why He Always Sounds Retarded

Gmail Chat Between Jason and Bardes

It's almost as though nothing has changed. Read below:

Sent at 7:29 PM on Saturday

Jason: yo

yo yo yo yo yo

do you even know about the chat feature?????

look down here!!!!!

JOHN!

over on the left

next to the email

can you see this box blinkin?!?!???!

YOU SUCK

YOU CUk

FUCK JOHN BARDES

BArdes is gaaaaaaaaay

lmn;jn

ln

Sent at 7:41 PM on Saturday
me: hi

i miss you too

did you just get the link i sent you?

You know the times are a-changin' when...

...the new black president is grooving to some live Dead at his inaugural ball.

A Salute

Carleton isn't known for producing superstars - we're the strong, silent type, generally - but one of us has made the leap from beer pong participant to genuine phenomenon. Soccer players, you'll know him well: it's Colin Steers, and he'll be appearing on Season 2 of the smash Bravo reality show Make Me A Supermodel. Click through for more details, including profiles of the other competitors - I hate to even call them 'competitors', as they're hardly worthy - that Colin will devastate.

A very sad day...

Dear all.  As I was perusing the internets today, I made a sad discovery.  Please, find out yourselves:

http://www.yourankit.com

Love to all, especially Jason and Nolan.

Yeah, fuck that guy!

Seeing "Murph"'s copy of The Voice has managed to make me less than eager to be a Carleton alum (seniors 2010 wooh!). Because then I'll be constantly reminded that losers and fuckholes are always the ones congratulated and simply noticed (and how is it a lot of them are in my year? First I have to go to Wofford then I'm stuck with troglodytes like Jim Avery, damn Doritos licker). I mean usually because Jason, you appear in a lot of photos and articles for what seems to be no reason at all except you are Jason Hitchcock, emphasis on the"cock".

How is it being a Carleton alum, my friends? I remain your inside source to all Carleton buzz. I'll keep you updated on Gonzo's unreasonable fame and Tom's lame existence (that guy really sucks, always barging into people's homes and using their things)*. I will make sure that anyone you hate will be watched- in other words I will make sure that, using "Murph"'s words, "mouth breathers" and "milk drinkers" will always remain said breathers and drinkers.

And in the meantime, I hope to see you.

*minus McKay naturally.